WhiteboyStyle.com //The Most Offensive Fucker Around//

Sunday, November 4th, 2007

Car Alarms...What A Waste Of Money!
Posted @ 4:22pm

I have to take a quick moment here, to inform you all, if you have a car alarm in your car....take it back, or throw it out. I have come the the conclusion that car alarms only go off in large parking lots (such as malls, restaurants, amusement parks), randomly during the day, and during heavy thunderstorms!

Lemme tell you, that car alarm is not stopping anyone from breaking into your shit....it's just pissing me off. Nothing is more annoying than listening to a car alarm go off for 10 minutes in the middle of the afternoon. No ones dumb enough to break into a car at 3pm! That's retarded.

In fact, I used to hang out with people who broke into cars for a living, and I will tell you why those alarms are not helping your cause. Car thieves are smart enough to not break into cars with alarms. How do they know?

They have little tiny blinking lights!

Therefore....don't waste your money on an annoying car alarm that's randomly going to go off when you're nowhere near it...

Just buy a tiny fucking blinking light!

Car thieves won't touch ya!

That, and not putting anything valuable in your car, and leaving the doors unlocked helps too.

Or you could just be like me, and fill your car up with so much trash, that anyone trying to steal anything is gonna have to work for it!

Write that down!
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Sign The Wall//IM Me

Page Rank Bitch!
Posted @ 4:16pm

I just had to brag for a second.

Whiteboystyle.com has finally been recognized by Google Page Rank. If you are using Mozilla Firefox, and look up at your tool bar, you will see a little green bar. That is Googles page ranking for each page you visit, rating it on it's importance to the world.

Whiteboystyle went from not even registering, to a 6 outta 10!

May not seem like much...but when pages like Myspace, and Hotmail are rated 8 outta 10....a 6 is perfectly fine with me.

At this time, I wanna thank the loyal fans, who keep visiting, even when I take a month and a half off from updating the site. Without you...this is just me talking to myself....

With a bombass page rank!
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Sign The Wall//IM Me

They Say It's My Birthday
Posted @ 3:55pm

Okay, so today isn't my birthday, but Friday was. Yes, 25 wonderful years ago, I emerged from giant vagina to wreak havoc upon society!

So Friday....we celebrated.

I wasn't even planning on having a party this year. I am on vacation...but the lack of planning for it made it seem pointless. However, Tuesday, Wifey and I decided to make it happen.

And it was fucking awesome! If you missed it...that totally sucks for you. We had everything, booze, women, my drunk sister-in-law playing everyones favorite game - "Is That Guy Gay?". There was even a good ol fashioned slober-knocker of a bar fight in the parking lot...and I got front row seats!

This guy had been drinking for a few hours when I met him at 8pm. He was a 40 year old hick...but very nice, and a straight up pool hustler. Ever since Doubles had been remodeled, theres only 1 pool table, which pisses some patrons off....but whatever! This old guy ended up getting into an argument later in the evening with 2 other younger guys shooting pool. The hick wanted to play these 2 guys for $50 bucks.

These guys don't know this dude, they're in the middle of a game (not gambling), and theres about 5 people waiting to play still.

These 2 guys end up telling the guy the hick, that they aren't interested...but he's relentless. He starts calling them pussies, and tellin them their pool game sucks...blah, blah, blah.....stupid drunk dude talk.

They go their seperate ways, but for the next hour, I see the drunk hick, sitting in the corner, staring them down.

Hold on, we're about to get to the good part!

Later, a crowd of us are out back on the patio smoking away, when suddenly, the hick comes shoving through our crowd, spilling Irinas drink all over her triple z breasts (sorry...had to add that in), and runs out to the parking lot, screaming back at someone on the patio.

Turns out, it's one of the 2 guys he was fighting with at the pool table earlier. The hick keeps eggin this guy on to come out to the parking lot. The other guy walks to the patio gate, yelling, screaming, talking shit, with 2 people holding him back....and then...

BAM!

I could've stopped it....

That's what I normally do, break up bar fights, and convince the drunks that we're all friends.

I thought about stopping it....

I was about to....I was right there....2 feet away!

Then I said...

Fuck it!

Anyway.....the hick clocks the other guy in the face.

Suddenly, he goes red....all the people holding him back have been thrown off. He storms out to the parking, and shoves the hick to the ground. The hick had backed into the curb, and fell flat on his back into some bushes. That's when the other, younger guy hopped ontop of him....and it was all over.

BAM!
BAM!
BAM!
BAM!

The hick got decked in the face a good 15 times before he was pulled off.

However, let's give the hick props, he hopped right back up onto his feet ready for more.

The owner finally got out there, threw out the hick, and restored peace in the bar.

Just like a blond teenage drama queen, I ran inside to tell everyone what they missed.

That was the highlight of the evening. Good people, good times, and some damn good stories.

Sadly...I'm now 15 years away from regular rectal exams!
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Sign The Wall//IM Me

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