The FBI declaring Juggalos a gang may be the most sad, and hilarious thing I’ve heard all week. Last time I checked, Juggalos were a bunch of retarded hillbillies and wannabe posers who acted tough, but in reality, were a bunch of giant pussies stealing their sisters make up, and living in their moms basements.
If you ask the FBI though, this is what they have to say:
The Juggalos, a loosely-organized hybrid gang, are rapidly expanding into many US communities although recognized as a gang in only four states, many Juggalos subsets exhibit gang-like behavior and engage in criminal activity and violence law enforcement officials in at least 21 states have identified criminal Juggalo subsets, according to NGIC reportingMost crimes committed by Juggalos are sporadic, disorganized, individualistic, and often involve simple assault, personal drug use and possession, petty theft, and vandalism however, open source reporting suggests that a small number of Juggalos are forming more organized subsets and engaging in more gang-like criminal activity, such as felony assaults, thefts, robberies, and drug sales social networking websites are a popular conveyance for Juggalo sub-culture to communicate and expand.
Wait, Juggalos are getting more organized? I couldn’t believe it, so i decided to go straight to the source, and find out what a REAL Juggalo thought about the situation…
Disclaimer: The following video is just fucking awful…and really fucking long. By no means do I expect anyone to sit through the full 10 minutes of this video. In fact, I recommend you don’t watch the full thing. Hell, I’ll be impressed if you can sit through 3 minutes. You’ve been warned.
Well, that was absolutely no help at all. Turns out not even the fucking Juggalos know what the fuck they are. Hell, by this dudes definition, not only am I NOT a Juggalo, but I also AM a Juggalo.
That’s fucking deep, man!
I’m gonna be honest though, if I see three morons coming at me in clown make up trying to jump me, the FIRST thing I’m going to do is tell them I’m calling their moms! I imagine that should atleast scare off one of them. I will then proceed to mock the other two until they cry. I say we put up the Juggalos against the Crips, and see how that “gang war” turns out. I don’t care how much Faygo the Juggalos are packing, odds are they’re going down pretty quick.
At the end of the day, if you’re dumb enough to put on clown make up, and listen to two 40 year old morons who ARE STILL rapping about smoking pot, and fucking my mom, you deserve to be mocked. It’s just fucking SAD!
36 seconds. I couldn’t understand what he was saying and I couldn’t stand looking at his creepy face.
What’s wrong with a really evil dude wearing makeup? Nothing. Just pointing that out. Fear the squirrel!
Oh yeah, you know where you can stick your comment moderation!
Zombies eat juggalos for dinner
You’ve finally been IP Tagged!
Noooooooooo
Let’s see if the gravatars are working
Yes they are
Once I heard how litetemagily tame ICP’s music was, it made the juggalo thing that much harder to stomach. And in 2008? It can’t be anything other than a big joke.
What you posted was actually very reasonable. But, what about this? what if you added a little information? I mean, I don’t want to tell you how to run your blog, however suppose you added a post title that makes people want more? I mean FBI Declares Juggalos A Gang…KKK Rethinks Strategy | Whiteboystyle.com is a little boring. You should peek at Yahoo’s front page and watch how they create article titles to get viewers interested. You might add a related video or a related picture or two to grab people interested about everything’ve written. In my opinion, it would bring your blog a little livelier.
I appreciate the criticism, but I’m doing just fine. Thanks though!
Cool work. Hopin’ for more.